skip it, please

twirling and spinning alongside so many other people.  we are our own audience.  eveyone swirling and turning around together make nothing.  but memories are the only connection many of us have left.  I dont know my friends from high school anymore, and they dont know me.  But I remember them vividly.  I know that I had conversations with her, but I dont remember what we actually talked about ever, or what the conversations sounded like.  I know the people I live with now, but I have no clue as to what will happen when the next few months roll by.  I may end up hating some of the people I know now.  I may have new friends with which I'll run these same cycles with.  And whats worse, I know Im not the only one

Every person in this building, this campus, this town, this state country continent planet has these same exact memories, these same EXACT stories.  Same shit different day like.  In all this chaos its no wonder people go crazy.  Its no wonder we do art. Not just artists mind you, but all of us, doing art.  We try to be unique.  We try to positively stand out.  if we cant do that, we want to give off the impression we're TRYING to keep a low profile.  We try to look mysterious, not out of place, not reclusive, not alone.  We want so much to be epic and grand that we delude ourselves into thinking we ARE unique.  Even now, writing this, Im not unique.  Thousands of people write as i write.  They too are just sitting in bed on a mac, slapping away at a fly that wont quit, festering in self absorption.  And the fact that I have figured that out? not unique at all.  Im no smarter for figuring it out than any other person.  Hell, there isnt even THAT much to figure out.  We all share these thoughts, and we all feel the need to broadcast it.  Even me, who could say "nonono, im doing this only for me, this blog entry is for my benefit alone" is full of shit.  This post is for anyone whos had the patience to read on and on and on this far.  But I doubt any of you have. I would have given up a long time ago I admit.  I would if I were you, have given up at the paragraph break and skipped down to the last line.  Because admittedly, this stuff really isnt worth reading and i hold no grudges to anyone who doesnt care to read it all.  

so I suppose I've lost my steam at this point, maybe.  We all have work to do, so that means me as well.  I guess I'll keep writing this stuff tomorrow mayhaps.